The Scale

Diana (Blaze) Hansen said we should write a poem, I agreed and we did. She is yellow like awesome lemons.

Some days I wake up and the wind is strong enough to blow me over.
To seep into my mental stability and cause fragmentation.
My dreams seem so big in this prison, my will so small.
As hard as I wish, the haunted eyes never leave my mirror.
The sick twisted smile of death never stops haunting my dreams.
Death, so beautiful and enticing, dressed to kill.
Breathing in my ear to let go, to drop the sand before the last grains leave my hand.
Trapped in an hour glass, with too many cracks, why shouldn’t I tip the scale?

I tip the scale
And watch it
Shatter and scatter
But sadder I sat her
with big rings
Like Saturn

Under these eyes of mine
Her eyes on fire
Ready to burn a hole
In her X-Man like Cyclops.
But she acts like it don't matter

Little Jean's Gray
But she'll rise like the Phoenix.
Not that I'm insensitive to her feelings,
But two depressed suicidals
Should not be together;

In our dream house
But the paint was peeling.

Some days, I wake up
And think the wind's become a typhoon
And whether it's my time to
Die soon.

Have the wind seep in the cracks
Of my skin
And leave me shattered and scattered
like both my prized pride and mood.

So I run,
I run from her

So I run,
I run from me.

My brain screams,
"Catch your breath, take a second".

My heart yells,
"Shit, take two!"

My lungs say
They cant take no more,
And I feel their rebuke

But shit,
Death's looking attractive
In his cheap suit.

Is loving a ghost better then this infatuation with the past.
Wearing memories across my heart like scars from battle.
I keep telling him to slow down, my mind ain't keeping up with the pace.
All we ever wanted was to be together.
Now holding dreams in our back pockets like extra change,
wanting to turn them into something more then fools gold.
Trapped inside this hourglass, watching them turn to rust,
while time seeps through the cracks bringing me closer to this sin.

See, the thing is,
You can only run from your sins
till you buckle and fold
loveless, alone
in the cold winter snow

In the outskirts of town
Passed out
on the dirt road

Broken,
Like a jagged piece of glass

She says I used her
Like another piece of ass

But that's far from the truth,
I swear to God
I thought I could save her
But it's over
Fade to black

I'm an Aries
Naturally hard headed
And she was a Taurus
Looking back,
All she spoke was bull shit

She was the Beatles
And I was Gang Starr
She was Come Together
And I was Full Clip

I'm stressing
God gave me a blessing
Said "Boy, you take this.
You hide it from the sinners".

And I hid it in plain sight
But lost it
Now all I wanna do
Is survive another winter.Tweet

Garfield and Marmaduke

I felt her stomach,

A little awkward moment passed
Before I asked,

“What am I feeling for here?”.

I jokingly asked her if she was pregnant…

And just then, I could literally read the shame coming off her face.

Growing up,

She used to love reading newspaper comic strips

Preferably, Garfield and Marmaduke.

I remember all the trouble she got in to

Or maybe it was all the trouble she got us through

This goddess who looked me square in the eyes

And told me she was sexually assaulted.

I nearly lost it,

Looking at each other dead in the eyes,

I couldn’t imagine the price that it costed.

Tears welling up in the both of us,

I thought God was supposed to be looking over us

I guess God was too busy looking over us

I guess this black cloud really hung over us.

As a child, she loved reading newspaper comic strips

Especially Garfield and Marmaduke

Now as an adult, she's looking me dead in the eyes

Telling me, “Please don’t tell my mama”,

Bruised.

At the time, I was the only one who knew

Who knew, I’d have to hold up the sky almost overnight?

I still remember when she used to wear her hair in pigtails

And her little over bite.

But today, I’m just a male poet

Trying to write about a pain I’ll never understand

Or fully grasp,

One I’ll never have to worry about

Because I was born a man.

Even now, I don’t know how to properly write

About this girl’s pain

What the Hell do I even say?

That it’s okay?

That Death is already coming to claim

That cold wraith?

But I don’t get angry,

She doesn’t need anger,

Instead, I tell her that she’s brave

And that I’ll be there for her

Every step of the way

And she doesn’t need to feel ashamed.

Now tell me,

What the fuck kind of man needs to resort to rape?

I could say threats

But I’ll save that bravado.

Just know that I made sure that you were just a footnote

As I undid your damage

And helped her fill in her potholes.

But fuck it,

I’m going to threaten anyways,

You better pray to God

Our paths don’t cross Demon

The only reason my brothers and I

Haven’t fucked you up

Is because you’re already dying

And you’re in more pain breathing.

When I was in the 4^th grade,

She was in the 2^nd;

I used to protect her

From her bullies.

But you can’t always be there

For your own

And I’m now learning that

The hard way.

No, I put my anger aside,

Instead, I tried to help her

Correct the mistake that God made.

I’ve been told if you play God,

You’ll get burned in the process

But for her, I’m ready to be left as charred remains.

Just a male artist,

Writing about a pain he’ll never fully grasp

Now I know how God feels

As she documents our pains,

If you ask me,

God’s been given a raw deal.

And humans were never meant to play God

So we sat there,

Both not knowing what to say…

So I silently left the room

And came back with the newspaper

And together,

We read Garfield and Marmaduke.

Tweet